Uh oh…she’s over thinking things again…
I was reading through old blog posts this evening and it really made me contemplate on how much life has moved on. How different Jude is to the child I wrestled with two years ago, before he moved to his wonderful new (not so new) school. I saw this post in particular and it made me chuckle. I remember the rage I was feeling at the time and the pace my fingers typed as I was left on call waiting.
My ambition to move Jude to a school that met his needs virtually became my full time job. I would spend entire days hurrying SEN Officers along, chasing paperwork and hassling administration within the council. It was painful but I was incredibly fortunate that I’m gifted with a hell of a lot of stubbornness. I was also in a situation where my working hours allowed me the opportunity (lucky me!) to spend half my life being passed from person to person within particular council departments. It was demoralising at times. My hopes raised when someone thought they knew what was going on but then destroying when you realised that nothing could be done for another week because such and such was away.
Fighting for what you need
It bothered me at the time as much as it still bothers me now, that many parents are unable to go through what I went through. They may not have the time, ability, comprehension or even just the morale to fight for what they as a family need. I hear from families in seemingly much worse situations than us, requesting support that really didn’t sound like a big deal but having to go through tribunals and appeals just to try and be heard.
How do you all do it? Did you have to fight to get adequate support for your child?
I miss my wee man
I’m really missing Jude at the moment but I’m trying to remember why I fought for this. He’s in a much better place emotionally. And developmentally, I can’t imagine him ever having so much support anywhere else. It’s really hard still. Sunday evenings, driving back to school with him. I hate it and love it at the same time. It’s a real mess with your head emotion…knowing it’s the best for Jude whilst stemming the guilt of handing your child over to someone else for the week. Eurgh.
Dreams
He’s growing up fast and it won’t be long until I have some new big decisions to make for him. Where will he live once he’s outgrown this school. I know it’s a good few years away but time flies and it’s something I need to plan for. My dream would be to have Jude at home with me. I wouldn’t work but would spend my time looking after him and going on adventures. But then I remember how flippin hard that can be at times. And is that really best for jude? Who knows? How do you even make these decisions?!
Do you reckon Jude would humour my dream of going travelling for a year in a camper van? Haha I can imagine Jude becoming famous all across Europe…
