What are your top stresses when it comes to hospital appointments?
For me, it’s absolutely that the doctor will be terrible with Jude. To define “terrible” I could give you so many examples but I think the biggest annoyance is when they behave as if they’ve never met a child before. Let alone a child with learning disabilities.
Talk to him, not me.
“Does Jude want some water?”
“I don’t know, why don’t you ask him?”
The biggest relief is when we enter the room and the first person they greet is Jude. They ask him how he is and only speak to me when they need valuable detail (and not just a conversation about favourite snacks, lunches, fruit…etc.) I mean, that’s obviously important stuff too but with regard to medics, perhaps a little less useful.
Visiting a hospital brings about so many anxieties in my brain. I’m a complete over-thinker but feel I can justify this through experience. My anxieties have all either happened in the past or only been diverted because of some minor miracle.
It’s interesting what the brain retains, isn’t it? I can remember doctors from as far back as Jude’s toddler days. And the doctor we saw today will definitely stay in my mind too. I’m pretty sure there is a ranging scale of awful to wonderfully graded paediatricians, physios, OT’s, etc all floating at the far side of my hippocampus. My memory is shocking but this part of my brain definitely holds a gaggle of doctors within its cells. Is that what you call a group of medics? I’m not so sure. Ha!
Today the doctor engaged with Jude. She watched and observed him. She didn’t push him too far but told him what she needed to know. She even answered his questions correctly and didn’t hurry him when he had to hide in the corner for a little while.
I’m sure many of you can relate to that immediate sense of relief. Within about ten seconds of meeting this doctor, I knew I could relax. She understood and respected Jude therefore I could let my guard down slightly. She was a good’un and one I wouldn’t have to battle with in some way, or even stand up for Jude against. Thankfully, most are like this but my immediate trust has been shattered so I always reserve a little moment to scan over someone before accepting them. Like a sensor, racing through a checklist in my head. Friendly, check. Spoke to Jude, check. Hasn’t turned her back to him, check. Giving him time and space, check. Is asking him answerable questions, check.
We’ll be going back again soon, I’m sure. My anxieties will still be there but at least I can have faith that the end destination holds someone on our side. It makes such a huge difference.
Tell me about your hospital experiences.