So Elsa has broken up from school and I have already fallen into that fog of wondering what day it is!
In Jude related news…following my latest email to our Social Worker, he has forwarded me onto another department because apparently, he isn’t actually my Social Worker after all. Confusing much?! Yes, he has some long, specific sounding title but is not my Social Worker…despite telling me he was. I’m sure he told me he’s my Social Worker. Why would I think otherwise? Anyway, just another example of the complexities involved in navigating the Hertfordshire County Council labyrinth.
I emailed him about increasing Jude’s hours again as I am so afraid our 95 are going to suddenly dwindle to nothing and I don’t want to put Jude in a situation where he is seeing Jade fairly regularly and then suddenly nothing. When I dropped him off at Jubilee House a while ago, a little girl who was meant to be attending couldn’t now come because her hours had run out. How sad is that? For her and for her parents. These hours are meant to help the whole family, the parents need the break as much, or sometimes more than the children. So it’s been 6 days and I haven’t heard anything so I assume I am now in another departmental waiting list. I will let you know if and when I hear from them! They have until tomorrow when I will email the non-Social Worker again and chase it up.
Today, Jude had his hair cut. A fairly typical activity for most people but not when you have a disabled child! So we always go to the same place and they love seeing Jude and always ask how school is and what he’s been up to and today, as usual, we had to sit and wait for another boy to finish getting his hair cut. Jude sat next to me and started his habitual “I don’t want my hair cut” (repeat 1000 times) “mummy, make dinner after this” (repeat 1000 times) “what’s that mummy? Is it sweeties?” Yes, Jude. (repeat 1000 times)
Then when he’s finally sitting in the chair…*repeat all of these at least 1000 times*
“are we finished now?”
“One left” (no idea what he means so me and the barber always just say that it is!
“Is that a kitchen?” “Yes, Jude so they can make a cup of tea sometimes”
“Is it hot?” “No, Jude, just the kettle.”
“Get down now.”
Then, the barber sprayed a little bit of water on Jude’s hair and a few drops landed on his shorts. I groaned in dismay as I knew he’d notice. “Mummy, I’m wet! Dry it please, dry it please, dry it please.” His latest weirdy is an absolute hatred of getting the slightest drip of water on his clothes. If he splashes a bit of drink on his t shirt, for example, he has to go and change! Anyway, we got over this by me telling Jude that it would dry on the walk home as it’s nice and sunny outside.
Repeat a few more of all the above sentences and we just about survived the hair cut. He did well though, I didn’t have to hold him still which I used to all the time. Literally in a headlock sometimes but now he just sits there talking non-stop! He always points his head down so I sometimes have to tilt his chin up but nothing like I used to have to do. Very proud of him. Here is a before and after shot!
It was actually a very positive experience and I think writing this blog has made me look at how I view ourselves when out and about. When I saw the people already in the barbers, meaning we’d have to sit and wait, I contemplated just abandoning our plan and going home. But no, I thought about what I have written on here about exposing Jude to the outside world more often and vice versa (!) and so we walked in and sat. I could feel the other family looking at us at first but then they just carried on reading magazines and talking. Why do such simple activities bother me this much? Is it because I know what Jude is capable of? It certainly doesn’t help that I have had people giving their very negative viewpoints in the past. Or is it because other people have such unpredictable responses? Both perhaps.
Anyway, for today it went well and I was proud of him. A x